In an Instant...9:08 AM
...you make a decision, based on gut instinct.
We made the best decision we could, taking into account all issues at hand. It's not something anyone ever wants to be involved with, but you go with your gut. Our gut said to help.
I apologize for the vagueness in describing what actually happened, but I am writing this more as a reflection on what happened and how I am trying to cope and react.
I was pissed. I was mad that our help was unappreciated, covered with a cloud of ungratefulness. Almost immediately the anger turned into empathy. Literally as I was talking about it, my perspective changed, but that didn't mean the anger had gone away.
Not everyone is raised in a strong family, whom instills what is right and wrong, how to be strong, or how to recognize when a situation is not healthy. Not everyone is blessed with a support system who will help above all, without judgement or hatred. Not everyone is taught to be strong, but know when to ask for help. So for those do not have these things, I need to have empathy. I need to remember that some are not strong enough to see a situation for what it is. Fear is a real emotion, that can paralyze the decision process.
I debated about writing about my experience because I knew I would leave all the details out, which is kinda not fair to you, my reader(s). But I had to express my thoughts about what happened, so I chose to sit here and write this, regardless. The delicate line of blogging is already grey, but with this experience I've decided to be on the cautious side. Trying to tell you how I feel, but not telling you exactly what happen is harder than I thought it would be.
What I can say is...
I'm growing, emotionally. My younger, immature version would just be completely angry. But I was able to see the other side and empathize quicker than I would have in the past. It's easy to just be angry at the situation, it takes a little more work to see it through someone else's eyes, especially someone you know nothing about.
Thank you to my family, all of them, not just my immediate family. They, along with a handful of close family friends, have taught me things that I will never take for granted. They've taught me life lessons that have left me at more at an advantage in many facets of my life.
Thank you to random strangers who see distress and help without hesitation.
There are so many bigger and scarier things happening in this world, this is minute in comparison. I don't seek to minimize the gravity of our world issues at all nor think this is anything in comparison to what we are seeing in the news and that others are living on a daily basis.
To the person who tried to make this about them and think that we acted in any way to seek a "hero card," you are pathetic. I have so many more words for you, but I hope that you realize that your words say more about you, not anything about us. A gut decision is just that, you react to each situation you are in. There are no heroics in anything that happened, so I hope you take a hard long look at yourself.
To anyone reading this that needs assistance, know that someone somewhere is willing to help you. They may not be related to you or even know you, but good is out there -- hidden or in plain sight. There are various resources available, but you have to make the decision to get help.
I don't think this makes any sense, but it feels cathartic. I've had a week or so to think reflect on what happened, but it will be something I never forget.
Trust your gut...